Although you and your former spouse were unable to make the marriage work, you have stayed amicable. The divorce was settled relatively quickly and was fair to all parties. You even managed to come to an agreement on child custody.
Despite doing everything to the best of your abilities, you have a feeling that your child is still struggling to process the separation of their parents. What are some of the signs that your child is struggling and what can you do to help?
Changes in attitude toward you
You and your child have always been extremely close. This changed post-divorce but you thought it would pass after a few weeks. The truth is, the relationship just hasn’t been the same. Your child is reluctant to visit and when they do they express anger toward you. While it can be tricky, the best thing you can do is try and find out what’s going on. Explain to them that they are allowed to express their feelings. Once everything is out in the open, you can find the source of the problem.
Often, it boils down to a simple misunderstanding. For instance, they may blame themselves for the separation or think that you are solely responsible. If you and your co-parent are able to work together to talk this through with them, it can be much more useful.
Loss of interest in hobbies
Your child may have been very into sports, even showing the potential that they might play professionally someday. Post-divorce, they’ve refused to attend practice and they rarely leave their room. A loss of interest in activities could be a sign that they are struggling to manage their emotions. In such a scenario, you may consider taking them to see a counselor who has knowledge of family situations.
Research shows that children can thrive after divorce, but this depends on receiving the right support. Having legal guidance behind you during divorce and custody negotiations can reduce the amount of tension.